Lament During the Season of Joy (bE+)

The first Christmas after my grandpa died was harrowing for me. I was 17 and loved him dearly, but best of all, he loved me dearly, too. The holiday season immediately after he died felt empty, and at times, I felt completely lost. It was the first time I remember going through the stages of grief. Interestingly, I felt something similar the first holiday season after I experienced spiritual abuse. Although my friends hadn’t died, losing the connection with them was in some ways just as painful because while my grandpa had no choice to leave me, my friends did, and they chose the side that hurt me, simply compounding the trauma I was already experiencing.

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