A New Grief: 8 kindnesses to remember and apply when you're suffering from a loss

Someone let my family down in a very painful way this past week. Someone we wholly trusted with all we hold dear. Someone whom we could never have foreseen causing this depth of grief.

And yet, here we are, soaked in our losses. Knowing there is life beyond the present but unable to see it.

Do you know this feeling?

Maybe you know it well, like I do. I have felt this grief many times. Enough to know a long list of best practices by heart:

1. Don’t distract yourself from your emotions. You won’t truly heal if you don’t allow yourself the space and time to be present with how you feel.

2. Combine #1 with this: allow breaks. A break and a coping mechanism of persistent distraction are not one in the same. They are different. Permit yourself periods of transcendence. Periods when the world fades a bit for a little while by listening to a favorite comedian or musician. By dancing or painting or reading or jogging or cooking a favorite recipe.

3. Be aware of your needs from moment to moment and seek their fulfillment as you’re able. As long as your needs do not harm you or someone else.